Wrestling with God

By: Carolyn Crocker

Psalm 30:5

Weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.

When Jacob was on his way back to the land of his father he heard that Esau had sent out an army of four hundred, and he was afraid. So he sent various herds of animals, his wives and his children out before him. Jacob himself lingered behind where he wrestled all night with an angel. In the morning the angel blessed him and gave him the name Israel.

When I was pregnant with my second son, the doctors wanted me to have an amniocentesis.  I knew that the risk of miscarriage would be greatly increased, and I did not want to lose the child. But I was also terrified of having a Down Syndrome child and wanted to be able to prepare myself for such an eventuality. The night before I had to schedule the procedure I could not sleep. I wrestled with God, asking him to tell me what to do, begging him to give me either a healthy child or the strength to deal with what might come. I got no answers. But in the early morning - about 5:00 - a tremendous peace washed over me and I slept.

I did not have the procedure. My son is now 23 years old. He will be graduating this June from one of the most prestigious schools of architecture in the country. He walks with God and is a blessing to his parents and to everyone he meets.

TAKE THE CHALLENGE: When have I wrestled with issues that seemed to have no solution, only to have God show me another way I had not expected?